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第一章

特雷

In time there would be a big company. And in time there would be software programs millions of lines long at the core of billions of computers used around the world. There would be riches and rivals and constant worry about how to stay at the forefront of a technological revolution.

未来某一天，有一家大公司将会诞生。有一天，长达数百万行的软件程序将成为全球数十亿台电脑的核心。财富、竞争对手会随之而来，你随时都在担忧如何一直走在科技革命的最前端。

Before all of that, there was a pack of cards and a single goal: beat my grandmother.

不过在那一切发生以前，我只有一副牌和一个目标：打败我的祖母。

In my family there was no faster way to win favor than to be good at games, especially card games. If you were confident in rummy or bridge or canasta, you had our respect, which made my maternal grandmother, Adelle Thompson, a household legend. “Gami’s the best at cards” was something I heard a lot as a kid.

在我家，想赢得青睐最好的方法就是要很会玩游戏，尤其是纸牌游戏。如果你是拉密（rummy）、桥牌或是凯纳斯特纸牌（canasta）高手，就能赢得我们全家人的尊敬。我的外祖母爱黛儿·汤普森（Adelle Thompson），我们都叫她加米（Gami），就因此成了家族的传奇。小时候，我很常听大家说：“加米最会打牌。”

Gami had grown up in rural Washington, in the railroad town of Enumclaw. It’s less than fifty miles from Seattle, but it was a world away in 1902, the year she was born. Her dad worked as a railroad telegraph operator and her mother, Ida Thompson—we called her Lala—would eventually earn a modest income by baking cakes and selling war bonds at the local lumber mill. Lala also played a lot of bridge. Her partners and opponents were the society people in town, the wives of bankers and the owner of the mill. These people may have had more money or higher social standing, but Lala leveled some of the difference by handily beating them at cards. This talent got passed on to Gami and to a degree to my mom, her only child.

加米在华盛顿乡间的铁路小镇伊纳姆克洛（Enumclaw）长大。距离西雅图只有不到80公里，不过在她出生的1902年，这个小镇算是相当偏僻。加米的父亲是铁路电报操作员，她的母亲艾达·汤普森（Ida Thompson）也靠着烘焙蛋糕以及在当地锯木厂贩卖战争债券，赚取不多的收入，我们都叫她拉拉（Lala）。拉拉也经常打桥牌。她的牌友与对手都是小镇的社交名流，像是银行家的太太、锯木厂老板等等。这些人或许更有钱，社会地位更高，但是拉拉靠着在牌桌上击败他们的常勝紀錄，縮小了雙方之間的差距。後來加米遺傳了這項天賦，又將一部分的天賦傳承給她的獨生女、我的母親身上。

My initiation into this family culture started early. When I was still in diapers, Lala started calling me “Trey,” the card player’s lingo for three. It was a play on the fact that I was the family’s third living Bill Gates, after my dad and grandfather. (I am actually number four, but my dad chose to go by “junior” and in turn I got called Bill Gates III.) Gami started me off at age five with Go Fish. In the coming years we would play thousands of hands of cards. We played for fun, and we played to tease each other and pass the time. But my grandmother also played to win—and she always did.

我很早就融入了这个家族的文化。还在蹒跚学步的时候，拉拉就开始叫我Trey，这是扑克牌玩家对三的行话。这是在玩弄一个事实，我是家里第三个活着的比尔·盖茨，在我爸爸和爷爷之后（实际上我是第四个，但我爸爸选择了用小比尔来称呼自己，所以我就成了比尔·盖茨三世）。五岁时，加米开始教我玩钓鱼。接下来的几年里，我们玩了成千上万次牌。我们为了好玩而玩，也为了互相捉弄和消磨时间而玩。但我祖母也是为了赢而玩——而且她总是能赢。

Her mastery fascinated me back then. How did she get so good? Was she born that way? She was religious, so maybe it was a gift from above? For a long time, I didn’t have an answer. All I knew was that every time we played, she won. No matter the game. No matter how hard I tried.

当时她的精湛技艺让我着迷。她怎么变得这么优秀？她生来就是这样吗？她有宗教信仰，所以也许这是上天赐予的礼物？很长一段时间，我都没有答案。我所知道的是，每次我们比赛，她都会赢。任何紙牌遊戏都一样。不論我多么努力尝试打败她，都沒有用。

When Christian Science rapidly expanded across the West Coast in the early 1900s, both my mother’s and father’s families became devout followers. I think my mother’s parents drew strength from Christian Science, embracing its belief that a person’s true identity is found in the spiritual and not the material. They were strict adherents. Because Christian Scientists don’t track chronological age, Gami never celebrated her birthday, never disclosed her age or even the year she was born. Despite her own convictions, Gami never imposed her views on others. My mom didn’t follow the faith, nor did our family. Gami never tried to persuade us to do otherwise.

1900 年代初期，当基督教科学在西海岸迅速扩张时，我父母的家人都成为了虔诚的追随者。我认为我母亲的父母从基督教科学派中汲取了力量，他们相信一个人的真实身份是在精神而不是物质中找到的。他们是严格的追随者。由于基督教科学家不追踪实际年龄，加米从未庆祝过她的生日，也从未透露过她的年龄，甚至她的出生年份。尽管有自己的信念，加米从未将自己的观点强加于他人。我妈妈没有遵循信仰，我们的家人也没有。加米从未试图说服我们不这样做。

Her faith probably had a role in shaping her into an extremely principled person. Even back then, I could grasp that Gami followed a strict personal code of fairness and justice and integrity. A life well-lived meant living simply, giving your time and money to others, and, most of all, using your brain—staying engaged with the world. She never lost her temper, never gossiped, or criticized. She was incapable of guile. Often she was the smartest person in the room, but she was careful to let others shine. She was basically a shy person, but she had an inner confidence that presented as a Zen-like calm.

她的信仰可能在塑造她成为一个极其有原则的人方面发挥了作用。即使在那时，我也能理解加米遵循严格的公平、正义和正直的个人准则。美好的生活意味着简单的生活，将时间和金钱奉献给他人，最重要的是，运用你的大脑——与世界保持联系。她从不发脾气，从不说闲话，从不批评。她不会欺骗。她常常是房间里最聪明的人，但她很小心地让别人发光。她本质上是个害羞的人，但内心却有一种禅宗般平静的自信。

Two months before my fifth birthday my grandfather, J. W. Maxwell Jr., died of cancer. He was only fifty-nine years old. Following his Christian Science beliefs, he had declined modern medical interventions. His last years were filled with pain, and Gami suffered as his caregiver. I learned later that my grandfather believed his sickness was somehow the result of something Gami had done, some unknown sin in the eyes of God, who was now punishing him. Still, she stoically stood by his side, supporting him until the end. One of my sharpest memories from childhood was how my parents wouldn’t let me attend his funeral. I was hardly aware of what was going on, other than the fact that my mother, father, and older sister got to see him off while I stayed behind with a babysitter. A year later, my great-grandmother Lala died while visiting Gami at her home.

在我五岁生日前两个月，我的祖父 J. W. Maxwell Jr. 因癌症去世。他年仅五十九岁。遵循基督教科学信仰，他拒绝了现代医疗干预措施。他的最后几年充满了痛苦，加米作为他的照顾者也承受着痛苦。后来我得知，祖父相信他的病是加米所做的事情的结果，是上帝眼中某种未知的罪孽，现在上帝正在惩罚他。尽管如此，她还是坚定地站在他身边，支持他直到最后。我童年时最清晰的记忆之一就是我的父母不让我参加他的葬礼。我几乎不知道发生了什么事，只知道我的母亲、父亲和姐姐要去送他，而我则留在保姆身边。一年后，我的曾祖母拉拉在去加米家探望她时去世了。

From that point on, Gami channeled all her love and attention into me and my older sister, Kristi—and later my sister Libby. She would be a constant presence in our young lives and have a profound effect on who we would become. She read to me before I could hold a book and for years after, covering the classics like The Wind in the Willows, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, and Charlotte’s Web. After my grandfather died, Gami started to teach me to read for myself, helping me sound out the words in The Nine Friendly Dogs, It’s a Lovely Day, and other books in our house. When we had worked through all of those, she drove me to the Northeast Seattle Library to load up on more books. I was aware that she read a lot and seemed to know something about everything.

从那时起，加米将她所有的爱和注意力都倾注到了我和我的姐姐克里斯蒂身上，后来又转移到了我的姐姐利比身上。她将永远存在于我们年轻的生活中，并对我们成为什么样的人产生深远的影响。在我还没有拿起书之前，她就给我读书，并持续了好几年，涵盖了《柳林风声》、《汤姆索亚历险记》和《夏洛特的网》等经典作品。我祖父去世后，加米开始教我自己读书，帮助我读出《九只友善的狗》、《这是美好的一天》以及我们家里的其他书籍中的单词。当我们完成所有这些工作后，她开车送我去西雅图东北部图书馆加载更多书籍。我知道她读了很多书，似乎什么都知道。

My grandparents had built a house in the upscale Seattle neighborhood of Windermere big enough to accommodate grandkids and family gatherings. Gami continued to live there after my grandfather died. On some weekends Kristi and I would stay over, alternating who got the privilege of sleeping in Gami’s room. The other one slept in a nearby bedroom where everything from walls to curtains was pale blue. Light from the street and passing cars painted eerie shadows in that blue room. I got scared sleeping there and was always glad when it was my turn to stay in Gami’s room.

我的祖父母在西雅图温德米尔的高档社区建造了一栋房子，足够容纳孙子和家庭聚会。我祖父去世后，加米继续住在那里。有些周末，克里斯蒂和我会留下来，轮流谁有幸睡在加米的房间里。另一个人睡在附近的一间卧室里，从墙壁到窗帘，一切都是淡蓝色的。街道的灯光和过往的汽车在那个蓝色的房间里留下了怪异的阴影。我睡在那里很害怕，当轮到我住在加米的房间时，我总是很高兴。

Those weekend visits were special. Her house was just a couple of miles from ours, but spending time there felt like a vacation. She had a pool and compact mini golf course we’d play in the side yard, set up by my grandfather. She also allowed us the treat of television—a tightly controlled substance at our own house. Gami was up for anything; thanks to her, my sisters and I became avid game players who made anything—Monopoly, Risk, Concentration—into a competitive sport. We’d buy two copies of a jigsaw puzzle so we could race to see who finished first. But we knew her preference. Most nights after dinner, she dealt the cards and then proceeded to kick our butts.

这些周末的探访很特别。虽然加米家离我们家只有几公里，但每次去那里过周末，感觉就像在度假。她家有一座游泳池，外祖父还在侧院搭了简易迷你高尔夫球场，我们经常在那里玩。她还允许我们享受看电视的乐趣（电视在我们家是被严格管控的）。加米对所有事情都很有兴趣，多亏了她，我和妹妹们都成了狂热的游戏玩家，把大富翁、战国风云（Risk）与注意力游戏（Concentration）等全都变成了竞技运动。我们会买两份一样的拼图，比赛看谁先完成。不过我们都知道加米的最爱。多数晚饭过后，她会开始发牌，然后狠狠打败我们。

I was about eight when I got my first glimmer of how she did it. I still remember the day: I’m sitting across from my grandmother at the dining room table, Kristi next to me. The room has one of those huge old wooden radios that even then was a relic of the past. Along another wall is a big cabinet where Gami stored the special dishes that we used every Sunday for dinner.

大概在我八岁时，我第一次窥见加米的秘密。我一直记得那天的场景：我坐在餐桌前，外祖母坐在我对面，克莉丝蒂坐在我旁边。房间里有一台老旧的大型木制收音机，即便在当时也算是历史遗物。另一面墙有一个大型橱柜，里面摆放着我们每个星期天晚餐时才会使用的特别餐具。

It’s quiet, except for the slapping of cards on the table, a frenzy of drawing and matching cards in rapid fire. We’re playing Pounce, a fast-paced, group form of solitaire. A serial Pounce winner can keep track of what’s in their hand, what cards are showing in all the players’ individual piles, and what’s in the communal piles on the table. It rewards a strong working memory and the pattern-matching ability to instantly recognize how a card that comes up on the table fits into what you hold in your hand. But I don’t know any of this. All I know is that whatever it is that’s needed to turn luck in your favor, Gami has it.

房间非常安静，只听得到纸牌拍打桌面的声音，以及疯狂快速抽牌与配对的声音。我们正在玩猫捉老鼠（Pounce），这是一种快节奏的多人接龙纸牌游戏。连续获胜的高手能够同时记住自己手中的牌、所有玩家的个人牌堆中的每一张牌、以及桌面上的公共牌堆中的每一张牌。这个游戏会提升你的工作记忆与模式配对能力，让你能迅速辨认桌上出现的牌如何与你手中的牌配对。但当时的我什么都不懂。我只知道，加米拥有让运气转向她所需要的一切能力。

I am staring at my cards, my head racing to find matches. Then I hear Gami say: “Your six card plays.” And then, “Your nine card plays.” She’s coaching my sister and me while also playing her own hand. She somehow grasps everything happening at the table and even seems to know the cards we’re each holding—and it’s not magic. How is she doing it? To anyone who plays cards, this is basic stuff. The more closely you can track your opponent’s hand, the better your chances of winning. Still, to me at that age, it’s a revelation. I see for the first time that for all the mystery and luck in a game of cards, there are things that I can learn to increase my chances of winning. I realize Gami isn’t just lucky or talented. She’s trained her brain. And I can too.

我盯着手中的牌，大脑迅速寻找可以配对的牌。然后我听到加米说：“你可以出六，”接着她又说：“你的九可以出了。”她一边指导我和姐姐出牌，一边玩自己的牌。她看不到我们手中的牌，但是她知道我们有哪些牌，这可不是魔法。她怎么做到的？对所有玩牌的人来说，这是基本能力。你越能记住对手的牌，就越有机会赢。但对于那个年纪的我来说，这是很重要的一课。我第一次意识到，扑克牌游戏虽然充满了神秘与运气成分，还是有我可以学习的东西，来增加赢牌机会。我知道，加米不仅仅是运气好、有天分。她会训练自己的大脑。我也可以。

From that time on, I would sit down to a game of cards with an awareness that each hand dealt offered the chance to learn—if only I would take it. She knew it too. That didn’t mean she made the path easy. She could have sat me down and walked me through the do’s and don’ts, the strategies and tactics of various games. That wasn’t Gami’s way. She wasn’t didactic. She led by example. So we played and played.

从那时候开始，每当我坐下来打牌，我都会清楚意识到，每一手牌都是一次学习机会，只要我愿意把握机会。加米也知道这一点。但是这并不代表她会让这个学习过程变得容易。她大可一步一步告诉我各种游戏的注意事项、策略与战术。但那不是加米的作风。她不爱说教。她以身作则。所以我们就是不断地打牌。

We played Pounce, gin rummy, hearts, and my favorite, sevens. We played her favorite, a complicated form of gin she called Coast Guard rummy. We played a little bridge. We played our way through a volume of Hoyle’s, front to back, dealing games popular and not—even pinochle.

我们玩猫捉老鼠、金罗美（gin rummy）、伤心小栈（hearts），以及我最爱的排七。我们会玩她最喜欢的复杂版金罗美游戏，她称之为海巡罗美（Coast Guard rummy）。我们偶尔也会玩桥牌。我们从头到尾玩遍《霍尔纸牌游戏正式规则》（Hoyle’s Official Rules of Card Games）里所有的游戏，热门与冷门的都玩，包括皮纳克尔（pinochle）。

All the while, I studied her. In computer science there’s a thing called a state machine, a part of a program that receives an input and, based on the state of a set of conditions, takes the optimal action. My grandmother had a finely tuned state machine for cards; her mental algorithm methodically worked through probabilities, decision trees, and game theory. I couldn’t have articulated these concepts, but slowly I started to intuit them. I noticed that even at unique moments in a game—a combination of possible moves and odds she probably had never seen before—she usually made the optimal move. If she lost a good card at some point, later in the game I’d see she had sacrificed it for a reason: to set herself up for a win down the road.

从头到尾，我一直在研究加米的技巧。在计算机科学领域，有一种名为“状态机”（state machine）的东西，属于程序架构的一部分，能够接收输入，然后根据一组条件的状态采取最佳行动。我的外祖母拥有经过精准调校的纸牌状态机，她的心理算法能有条不紊地处理概率、决策树与博弈论。当时的我无法清楚表达这些概念，但是我已经凭着直觉逐渐理解这些概念。我发现，即使是游戏中的某些特殊时刻，出现加米可能从未见过的出牌与概率组合，她通常也能做出最佳决定。如果她在某个时刻失去了一张好牌，我会在后来的游戏过程中发现，她其实是刻意牺牲掉那张牌：为了最后的胜利而预做准备。

We played and played and I lost and lost. But I was watching, and improving. All along, Gami continued to gently encourage me. “Think smart, Trey. Think smart,” she’d say as I weighed my next move. Implicit was the idea that if I used my brain, stayed focused, I could figure out the right card to play. I could win.

我们不停地玩牌，我一次又一次地输牌。但是我不断观察、不断改进。加米一直温柔地鼓励我。当我苦思下一步该怎么出牌时，她会说：“要聪明地思考，特雷。聪明地思考。”这句话的潜台词就是：如果我能运用我的大脑、保持专注，就会想出如何打出正确的牌。我就能赢。

One day I did.

有一天，我真的赢了。

There was no fanfare. No grand prize. No high fives. I don’t even remember what game we were playing the first time I won more games in a day than she did. I do know my grandmother was pleased. I’m pretty sure she smiled, an acknowledgment that I was growing.

没有大肆庆祝、没有奖品、没有击掌。我甚至不记得，我第一次在一天之内赢牌的次数超过加米时，我们是在玩哪些游戏。我只知道，外祖母非常高兴。我很确定她露出了笑容，肯定我的进步。

Eventually—it took about five years—I was winning consistently. By that point I was almost a teenager, naturally competitive. I enjoyed the mental wrestling, as well as the deeply satisfying feeling you get from learning a new skill. Card playing taught me that no matter how complex or even mysterious something seems, you often can figure it out. The world can be understood.

后来，大概花了五年时间，我终于可以稳定地赢牌。那时的我差不多进入青春期，自然特别好胜。我喜欢智力上的较量，也喜欢学习新技能之后得到的强烈满足感。纸牌游戏让我学会，无论某件事看起来多么复杂、多么神秘，你通常都可以想明白。这个世界是可以被理解的。

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I was born on October 28, 1955, the second of three kids. Kristi, born in 1954, was twenty-one months older; my sister Libby wouldn’t appear on the scene for nearly another decade. As a baby, I was dubbed “Happy Boy” for the wide grin I seemed to always display. It wasn’t that I didn’t cry, but the joy I apparently felt seemed to override all other emotions. My other notable early trait might be described as excess energy. I rocked. At first on a rubber hobby horse, for hours on hours. And as I grew older, I kept it up without the horse, rocking while seated, while standing, anytime I got to really thinking about something. Rocking was like a metronome for my brain. It still is.

我出生于1955年10月28日，在三个孩子中排行老二。克莉丝蒂1954年出生，比我大二十一个月；妹妹莉比要再过将近十年才会出生。婴儿时期的我总是满脸笑容，所以被昵称为“快乐男孩”（Happy Boy）。我不是不会哭，但我小时候感受到的快乐，似乎盖过了其他情绪。我小时候还有另一个明显的特征：精力过剩。我喜欢摇来摇去。一开始是坐在橡胶玩具马上，一坐就是好几小时。长大后，即使没有玩具马，我也会不停摇晃，坐着的时候摇晃，站着的时候摇晃，每当我在认真思考某件事时，身体也会不停摇晃。摇晃就像是我大脑的节拍器。直到现在依然如此。

Early on, my parents knew that the rhythm of my mind was different from that of other kids. Kristi, for one, did what she was told, played easily with other kids, and from the start got great grades. I did none of those things. My mother worried about me and warned my preschool teachers at Acorn Academy what to expect. At the end of my first year, the director of the school wrote: “His mother had prepared us for him for she seemed to feel that he was a great contrast to his sister. We heartily concurred with her in this conclusion, for he seemed determined to impress us with his complete lack of concern for any phase of school life. He did not know or care to know how to cut, put on his own coat, and was completely happy thus.” (It’s funny now that one of Kristi’s earliest memories of me includes the frustration of always being the one who had to wrestle me into my coat and then get me to lie on the floor so I was still enough for her to zip it up.)

我父母很早就知道我的心智节奏和其他小孩不一样。克莉丝蒂和其他小孩一样，很听话，很容易和其他小孩玩在一起，一开始上学就拿到好成绩。这些事情我全部做不到。我母亲很担心我，她还提前向橡果学院（Acorn Academy）幼儿园的老师说明我的情况。我上学的第一年接近尾声时，学校主任写道：“他的母亲事先告诉我们他的情况，她似乎觉得他和他姐姐完全相反，我们的看法也完全一样。他似乎就是想让我们知道，他对学校生活的各个方面都不关心。他不知道、也不想知道如何剪裁东西、穿上自己的外套，而且对此感到心满意足。”（有趣的是，克莉丝蒂对我最早的记忆就是很挫败的经验，她总是那个必须负责把我塞进外套的人，穿完外套后，她还要让我躺在地上，才能顺利帮我把拉链拉上。）

In my second year at Acorn Academy, I arrived “a newly aggressive, rebellious child,” a four-year-old who liked singing solo and taking imaginary trips. I scuffled with other kids, and was “frustrated and unhappy much of the time,” the director reported. Fortunately, my teachers were heartened by my long-term plans: “We feel very accepted by him since he is including us as passengers on his proposed moon shot,” they wrote. (I was ahead of Kennedy by a few years.)

在橡果学院的第二年，我成了“最近变得好斗、叛逆的孩子”，这个四岁小孩喜欢独唱，踏上想象的旅行。我经常和其他小孩打架，“多数时候看起来充满挫折、不开心”，主任在报告中写道。幸运的是，老师对于我的远大计划还是感到相当振奋：“我们觉得被他接纳了，因为他把我们列入他的登月之旅的乘客。”老师写道。（我的登月计划比肯尼迪还早了几年。）

What educators and my parents noted at an early age were hints of what would come. I channeled the same intensity that drew me into solving the puzzle of Gami’s card skill into anything that interested me—and nothing that didn’t. The things that interested me included reading, math, and being alone in my own head. The things that didn’t were the daily rituals of life and school, handwriting, art, and sports. Also, mostly everything my mother told me to do.

教育工作者和我父母很早就注意到某些迹象，也准确预示了未来的发展。我将钻研加米牌技的那种强烈热情，投入到任何我感兴趣的事物，至于那些我不感兴趣的事物，我则是完全不在意。我感兴趣的事情包括阅读、数学、沉浸在自己的思考中。不感兴趣的事情包括生活与学校的日常作息、写字、艺术与体育，还有大部分我妈妈叫我做的事。

My parents’ struggle with their hyperkinetic, brainy, often contrarian, tempestuous son would absorb much of their energy as I grew up and would indelibly shape our family. As I’ve grown older, I better understand just how instrumental they were in helping chart my unconventional path to adulthood.

在我的成长过程中，我的父母为了应对这个好动、聪明、常常唱反调、个性激烈的儿子，耗费了大量的精力，这也深深影响了我们的家庭。随着年纪渐长，我愈来愈能理解我的父母，在我非传统的成长道路上发挥了很关键的影响。

My father was known as a gentle giant, six-feet-seven-inches tall with a calm politeness you might not expect from a man who was often the biggest guy in the room. He had a direct, purposeful way of dealing with people that defined him and suited his career as a lawyer advising businesses and boards (and later as the first head of our philanthropic foundation). Though polite, he wasn’t shy to ask for what he wanted. As a college student, what he wanted was a dance partner.

我父亲被称为“温柔的巨人”，他身高200公分，举止冷静有礼。与人们的想象不同，因为他往往是房间里最高的人。他与人打交道的方式直接、目标明确，这既是他的为人，也非常适合他的职业——他是专门为企业与董事会提供咨询服务的律师（后来成为我们慈善基金会的首任领导人）。他彬彬有礼，但很勇于争取自己想要的。大学时，他想要的是一位舞伴。

In the fall of 1946, he was part of a wave of veterans on the G.I. Bill, the generous government program that gave millions of people an education they might not have afforded otherwise. The one downside, in my father’s estimation, was that the number of men on the University of Washington campus far surpassed the number of women. That meant the chances of finding a dance partner were low. At some point he asked a friend for help. Her name was Mary Maxwell.

1946年秋季，他和其他退伍军人一样，受惠于美国退伍军人权利法案（G.I. Bill）。这项慷慨的计划让数百万人获得了原本可能无法负担的教育机会。不过计划有一个缺点，据我父亲估计，华盛顿大学的男生人数远远超过女生，这意味着找到舞伴的概率非常低。后来他向一位名叫玛丽·麦斯威尔（Mary Maxwell）的朋友求助。

He knew she was an officer at a sorority, Kappa Kappa Gamma, so he asked: Did she know someone who might be interested in meeting a tall guy who liked to dance? She said she’d check. Time went by. No introduction came. One day while walking together just outside the sorority house, my dad asked her again if she knew someone suitable.

他知道她是卡帕卡帕加玛联谊会（Kappa Kappa Gamma）的干部，于是问她是否认识有兴趣认识一位喜欢跳舞的高个子男生的人。她说会问问看。过了一段时间，她没有介绍任何人给他。某天他们在联谊会办公室外散步时，我父亲再次问她是否有合适的人选。

“I have someone in mind,” she said. “Me.”

“我心里有一个人选，”她说，“就是我。”

My mother was five-foot-seven, and my dad told her that, literally, she didn’t measure up. “Mary,” he replied, “you’re too short.”

我母亲身高170公分，父亲告诉她，她没有达到标准——他指的就是字面意思。“玛丽，”他说，“你太矮了。”

My mom sidled up next him, stood on her tiptoes, put her hand atop her head, and retorted, “I am not! I’m tall.”

我母亲走到他身边，踮起脚尖，把手放在头顶上反驳道：“我不矮！我很高。”

My father always claimed his request for an introduction wasn’t a tricky way of getting my mom to go out with him. But that’s what happened. “By golly,” he said, “let’s have a date.” Then, as the story goes, two years later they got married.

父亲总是宣称，他要母亲帮他介绍舞伴，并不是为了要跟母亲约会而故意使诈。但事情就这样发生了。“真是的，”他说，“我们去约会吧。”据说两年后，他们就结婚了。

I always loved hearing this story because it so perfectly captures my parents’ personalities. My dad: deliberate and unapologetically pragmatic, sometimes even in matters of the heart. My mom: gregarious, and also not shy about getting what she wanted. It was a neat story, a distillation of the full story, one of differences that went beyond height, and which would ultimately play into who I became.

我一直很喜欢听这段故事，因为它完美地展现了我父母的个性。我爸：深思熟虑、超级务实，有时候甚至在感情上也是如此。我妈：活泼外向，完全不会羞于争取自己想要的。这是一个简短、精彩的故事，是完整故事的浓缩版，是一个关于身高以及其他差异的故事，而这个故事最终也深刻影响着我会成为什么样的人。

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My mom was meticulous about keeping records of her life, photo albums of family trips and school musicals, scrapbooks of newspaper clippings and telegrams. I recently found a set of letters that she and my father traded in the year leading up to their marriage in the spring of 1951. Six months before the wedding, my father was in his hometown working as an attorney, his first job after earning his law degree earlier that year. My mother was back at the university finishing her last year. A letter she wrote in October begins with her hope that in the pages that follow she would avoid the “emotional unbalance” she felt in a conversation they had a day earlier. She didn’t elaborate, but it seems like there were some pre-wedding worries about their union and how to bridge certain differences between them. She explained:

麦斯威尔家族 我妈非常严谨细致地保存了她的生活记录、家族旅行与学校音乐剧的相册、报纸简报与电报的剪贴簿。最近我发现了我父母在1951年春天结婚前一年的通信。婚礼前六个月，我父亲在家乡当律师，他在当年稍早取得了法律学位，这是他毕业后的第一份工作。我母亲则是回到大学校园，完成最后一年的学业。她在10月写了一封信给我父亲，开头她写道，希望接下来的信件内容避免出现“情绪失衡”的字眼，她觉得两人前一天的对话，就给她那种感受。她没有详细说明，但是即将结婚的两人，似乎对于彼此的结合以及如何弭平双方的差异，有一些忧虑。她在信中解释：

My objective conclusion about our relationship is that we have much in common and a very fine thing. We want much the same social life and home life. I think it’s true that we both want a very close marriage—that is, we want we two to be one. Although our social and family backgrounds are different, I think that we are able to be understanding about problems evolving from this, because as individuals we are much the same. We do both like to be dealing with ideas—to be continually thinking and learning…We both want the same—all the success in the world that can be gotten honestly and fairly. Even though we prize success highly, neither of us would consider it being worth it to be unjust so to push another man down. We would like our children to have the same basic values. Perhaps our “means” would be somewhat different but I am inclined to think we could present a solid front that would complement both of our points of view…You know Bill that if you truly loved me always, I would do anything in the world for you.

關於我們的關係，我的客觀結論是：我們有很多共同點，這是非常美好的一件事。我們對於社交生活與家庭生活的期望是一致的。我認為，我們確實都想擁有緊密的婚姻關係，也就是我們都希望兩人是一體的。雖然我們的社交與家庭背景不同，但是我認為我們能夠理解由此衍生的問題，因為作為個體，我們是相似的。我們都喜歡探討想法，不斷思考與學習……我們想要的東西也是一樣的，我們都希望在誠實與公平的前提下，獲得世界上可企及的成功。雖然我們高度重視成功，但我們都認為不可以為了成功而不公正地貶低另一個人。我們希望我們的小孩擁有同樣的基本價值觀。也許我們的「做事方法」有所不同，但是我傾向於認為，我們可以形成穩固的統一戰線，互補雙方的觀點……比爾，你知道，如果你真的一直愛我，我會為你做任何事。

I love you Bill

我愛你，比爾。

Mary

瑪麗

In the letter I glimpsed the private negotiations that surely continued all though my childhood and beyond. They nearly always maintained their solid front, in private working out their differences, most of which stemmed from how each was raised.

我在信中看到他们会私下协商，这样的沟通模式贯穿了我的童年时期与之后的生活。他们会形成稳固的统一战线，私下再解决两人的分歧，分歧大多源自于两人的成长背景。

My mom, Mary Maxwell, grew up in the embrace of a family culture set by her grandfather J. W. Maxwell, a banker who doted on my mom and was a model for a life of constant self-improvement. As a boy in Nebraska, J.W. quit school and talked himself into a job digging out the basement of a house owned by a local banker in return for money and room and board. When J.W. put down his shovel two months later, the man offered him a job at his bank. He was fifteen. After a few years learning the banking business, he moved to Washington state to carve out a new life. The 1893 depression wiped out his fledgling bank, and the coastal town he bet would boom instead went bust. He eventually took a steady job as a federal bank examiner, work that had him away from his family for months on end traveling on horseback, wagon, and train around the West measuring the health of small banks. Eventually he succeeded in starting his own bank. By the time he died in 1951 at age eighty-six, my great-grandfather was chairman of a major bank in Seattle and an active civic leader. He had also served as a mayor, a state legislator, a school board member, and a director of the Federal Reserve.

我的母亲玛丽成长的家庭文化，是她的祖父J. W. 麦斯威尔（J. W.Maxwell）建立的。她的祖父是一位银行家，非常宠爱我的母亲，终其一生都是持续自我提升的典范。麦斯威尔在内布拉斯加长大，辍学后就说服当地一位银行家，让他帮忙挖掘住家的地下室，借此换取金钱与食宿。两个月后，麦斯威尔放下铲子时，那位银行家直接要麦斯威尔到他的银行上班。当年他才15岁。他花了几年时间学习银行业务，之后搬到华盛顿展开新生活。1893年的经济萧条摧毁了他刚起步的银行业务，原本他预期经济会起飞的沿海小镇破产了。后来，他找了一份安稳的工作，成为联邦银行审查员。这份工作使他必须长时间离家，骑马、坐马车、搭火车在西部各地出差，评估小型银行的财务状况。最终他成功创立了自己的银行。1951年，当他在86岁过世时，我的外曾祖父已经是西雅图一家大银行的董事长，也是相当活跃的公民领袖。他担任过市长、州议员、学校董事会成员、联邦储备银行的总监。

The platform of wealth and opportunity set by J.W. and furthered by my grandfather, also a banker, meant that my mom would want for nothing as a child. She was a great student with a full slate of sports and activities with family and a wide circle of friends. Sundays were for family picnics and summer days for swimming at her grandparents’ beach house on Puget Sound. Sports and games were an essential part of any gathering—croquet, shuffleboard, and horseshoes were mainstays—and there was no question that my mom would learn to play tennis, ride horses, and become a graceful skier. In the Maxwell family, games held larger lessons. Golf, for instance, was a proxy for banking, both of which, her grandfather wrote, require “skill, continued practice, sobriety, patience, endurance and alertness.”

麦斯威尔建立起的财富与机会，在我外祖父（也是一位银行家）的掌管下蓬勃发展，这表示我母亲的童年生活不虞匮乏。她是优秀的学生，参与各种体育竞赛与活动，拥有广大的家族与朋友圈。每个星期天，她会跟家人一起野餐，夏天时就去她祖父在普吉特湾（Puget Sound）的海滨别墅游泳。在任何聚会场合，运动与比赛都是不可或缺的节目，主要包括槌球、沙狐球（shuffleboard）、掷马蹄铁（horseshoes），母亲当然也学会了打网球、骑马，也是优雅的滑雪好手。在麦斯威尔家族，比赛有着更深层的意义。举例来说，打高尔夫球就像经营银行，她的祖父写道，两者都需要“技巧、持续练习、保持清醒、耐心、毅力与警觉心。”

In one of my mother’s albums is a photo from when she was three or four years old. A group of neighborhood parents assembled their kids for the snapshot, each with their tricycles. On the back, Gami wrote the story of the picture. One boy had the biggest tricycle. My mom wanted him to trade with her so she could have the biggest trike. Somehow, she got him to agree. In the resulting photo, she’s beaming, sitting a full head taller than everyone else. She was never afraid to be strong, to occupy space.

在我母亲保存的其中一本相册中，有一张照片是在她三、四岁时拍摄的。一群邻居把孩子聚集在一起拍照，每个孩子都骑着三轮车。加米在照片背后写下当时的故事。有个男孩骑最大台的三轮车，我母亲希望能和他交换，这样她就能骑最大台的三轮车。不知她用了什么方法，母亲成功让那个男生答应了。照片中，她笑容灿烂地骑在三轮车上，比其他孩子高出一个头。她从不害怕展现强势，不怕去占据属于她的空间。

Where my mom got her confidence and ambition was probably equal parts the Maxwell side and Gami, who, beyond her card-table acuity, was valedictorian of her high school class, a gifted basketball player, widely read, and aimed for a bigger life outside of her hometown. It was at the University of Washington that she met my grandfather. My mom followed, entering UW in 1946 with the full support of two ambitious parents and a family-wide expectation that she would excel.

母亲的自信与企图心或许同时来自麦斯威尔家族与加米，加米不仅在牌桌上有敏锐观察力，她也是高中毕业班代表、天赋异禀的篮球选手，她博览群书，渴望离家追寻更宽广的人生。加米在华盛顿大学时，认识了我的外祖父。我母亲随后于1946年进入华盛顿大学，有志向远大的父母全力支持她，全家人都期望她能出类拔萃。

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Across Puget Sound from Seattle, my father’s hometown of Bremerton was best known for its Navy shipyard, celebrated as the place where battle-weary ships came to be fixed. Not too many years earlier it had a reputation as a town of gamblers and more saloons than anyone could stagger to in one day.

隔着普吉特湾与西雅图相望，就是我父亲的家乡布雷默顿（Bremerton），当地最知名的景点就是海军造船厂，破损的战舰都是在这里进行修复。就在几年前，这里被称为赌城，酒馆多到很难在一天之内走完。

Growing up, Kristi and I would ride the ferry to Bremerton to visit my father’s parents. From the ferry we’d walk a short distance up the hill to the house where my dad grew up. It was a small blue Craftsman on a quiet street. We’d stay with my grandparents for a night or two. If the TV was on, my grandfather would be watching boxing, which was pretty much the one diversion he allowed himself. My paternal grandmother, Lillian Elizabeth Gates, had the same spark for cards that Gami did, so we would often get a few games in. Like my maternal grandparents, my dad’s parents were Christian Scientists. One memory I have from those visits is of Grandma Gates in the kitchen every morning with a cup of coffee, quietly reading Mary Baker Eddy’s Daily Bible Lesson to my grandfather.

小时候，我姊克莉丝蒂和我会搭渡轮到布雷默顿探望我们的祖父母。下渡轮后，我们会沿着山坡走一段路，抵达我父亲从小成长的家，一栋蓝色的工匠风房屋，坐落在一条安静的街道上。我们会在那里住一、两个晚上。如果电视开着，就是祖父在看拳击比赛，那几乎是他唯一允许自己的消遣。我的祖母莉莲．伊丽莎白．盖茨（Lillian Elizabeth Gates）和加米一样喜欢玩牌，我们常会一起玩几回。我的祖父母和外祖父母一样，都是基督科学的信徒。我记得几次探望祖父母的情景，早上奶奶会在厨房，一边喝咖啡、一边静静地朗读玛丽．贝克．艾迪（Mary Baker Eddy）的每日圣经课文给祖父听。

When my dad talked about his childhood, he always seemed wistful about his father. He described him as a workaholic who left little time for much else in his life. He owned a furniture store, passed down from my great-grandfather, that had survived the Great Depression, but just barely. Constant anxiety about the family finances made my grandfather a hostage to the business. Behind the little blue house was an alley that in an earlier time my grandfather would pass through on his way home from work so that he could pick up bits of coal dropped by delivery trucks. My father said his dad never went to movies or took his son to baseball games; he saw such things as distractions that robbed time from the store. He always seemed to be running scared, my father said.

每当我爸谈起自己的童年时，总是对他父亲充满怀念。他说他父亲是工作狂，几乎没有把时间留给其他事。我祖父经营一间家具店，是我曾祖父传承下来的，勉强熬过了经济大萧条。我祖父一直很忧虑家里的财务状况，成了被生意绑架的人质。在蓝色小屋后方有一条巷子，早年我祖父下班返家经过那条巷子时，会沿路捡送货卡车掉落的煤块。我父亲说，他爸爸没有看过电影，也从不带儿子去看棒球赛：他认为那些事情会让他分心，占用他经营家具店的时间。父亲说，他爸爸总是生活在恐惧与担忧之中。

In a way, you couldn’t blame him. My grandfather had known poverty as a kid in Nome, Alaska, where his family scraped by while my great-grandfather, the first Bill Gates in our family, sought his fortune in the Gold Rush of the late 1800s. Bill Jr. had to quit school in the eighth grade to support the family. He sold newspapers in the icy streets of Nome and picked up whatever jobs he could while his dad was off prospecting. Eventually they would move back to Seattle, settling into the furniture business. Times got better for the family, but the anxieties of those early experiences never disappeared.

某种程度上，这不是他的错。我祖父在阿拉斯加州诺姆市（Nome）长大，小时候生活很贫困。全家人仅能勉强糊口的同时，我的曾祖父——也就是家族的第一个比尔·盖茨，搭上19世纪末的淘金热，外出寻找发财机会。小比尔不得不在八年级时辍学，开始赚钱养家。他在诺姆寒冷的街道上卖报纸，在父亲离家淘金期间，什么工作都做。后来，他们搬到西雅图开始从事家具业。家里的经济状况逐渐好转，但祖父早年生活经历留下的焦虑从未消失。

My grandfather also maintained what my dad called a very narrow view of the world. Dad attributed this partially to insecurities. Lacking a full education, my grandfather clung to what my dad called his axioms, rigid rules about the world and life. “Learn to earn, son, learn to earn,” he would tell my father. Education was about gaining the skills you needed to get a job. Nothing more.

我爸说，祖父的世界观一直非常狭隘。他将部分原因归咎于祖父缺乏安全感。祖父从未受过完整教育，总是紧守着自己的人生格言，对世界与人生自有一套规则。他会对父亲说：“要学会赚钱，儿子，学什么都是为了赚钱。”在他看来，教育只是为了获得工作所需的技能，仅此而已。

My grandmother, proud salutatorian of her high school class, had an axiom of her own, one that influenced my dad’s view on self-improvement: “The more you know, the more you don’t know.” But it wasn’t always easy for her at home. Even as women were starting to forge new paths in society, my dad’s father was stuck in a bygone time. He wouldn’t allow my father’s older sister, Merridy, to get her driver’s license. He wouldn’t consider sending her to college. The skills a woman needed were around the house.

我的祖母曾是充满自信的高中毕业生代表，她有自己的原则，影响了父亲对自我提升的看法：“你知道的越多，不知道的也越多。”但祖母在家中的日子并不好过。即使当时女性已开始在社会上开创职业生涯，祖父的观念却停留在过去。他不让父亲的姐姐梅瑞蒂（Merridy）考驾照，甚至不考虑送她上大学，认为女性只需要掌握持家相关的技能。

My father was very aware of the intellectual gap between himself and his father. Though not illiterate, his dad could hardly read, while my father wanted to use his head, wanted to go to college. He didn’t want to knuckle under to his father’s plan for him to join the furniture business.

父亲清楚地意识到自己与父亲之间存在智识上的鸿沟。祖父并非文盲，但几乎从不阅读；而父亲渴望善用自己的大脑，想要读大学，不愿遵循父亲为他规划的道路——接管家具行生意。

Next door to my dad’s family home was something seemingly out of a fairy tale: a Norman-style brick-and-stucco house with stained-glass windows and a tower topped by a conical roof. It looked so different from the Craftsman bungalows around it that locals dubbed it the “castle.” My father’s journey to a bigger life began when he started hanging at the castle with the Braman family. Jimmy, the oldest of the sons, was my dad’s inseparable best friend growing up. My dad said he marveled at Jimmy’s ability to turn a crazy idea into reality, and the two spent their days dreaming up all kinds of schemes and businesses. They ran a hamburger stand in the front yard, started a circus in the backyard. It’s funny to think that kids paid to watch my shirtless dad lie on a bed of nails. They also published a newspaper—The Weekly Receiver—where for a few cents their seventy subscribers got news picked off the radio and scores from local school football and baseball games.

我爸爸老家的隔壁，有一栋宛如童话故事里的房子：那是一栋诺曼式砖石灰泥建筑，装有彩色玻璃窗，还带着圆锥屋顶的塔楼。整栋建筑和周围的工匠式平房截然不同，被当地人称为“城堡”。我父亲经常和城堡的主人——布拉曼（Braman）一家一起玩耍，人生道路也从此拓宽。布拉曼家的大儿子吉米（Jimmy），是我爸成长过程中形影不离的死党。我爸说，他特别佩服吉米总能把疯狂的想法变成现实，两人整天都在畅想各种计划和创业构想。他们在前院摆摊卖汉堡，在院子里举办马戏团表演——有趣的是，孩子们居然愿意花钱来看我爸光着膀子躺在钉床上。他们还发行了一份叫《接收者周报》（The Weekly Receiver）的报纸，为70位订户提供新闻，花上几美分，就能看到从广播电台精选的新闻内容，以及当地学校足球和棒球赛的比分。

My dad became a surrogate son in the Braman family. In Jimmy’s father, he found a mentor and a model for the type of person he could become. A high school dropout, Dorm Braman started Bremerton’s largest millworks, would later become an officer in the Navy, get elected mayor of Seattle, and eventually serve as deputy transportation secretary in the Nixon administration. He designed and built that distinctive home with his own hands.

我爸就像布拉曼家的另一个儿子。他把吉米的父亲多姆视为人生导师和榜样，希望自己以后也能成为那样的人。多姆·布拉曼（Dorm Braman）高中时辍学，后来创办了布雷默顿最大的木工厂，之后还成了海军军官，当选西雅图市长，甚至担任过尼克松政府的运输部副部长。那栋风格独特的“城堡”，就是他亲手设计建造的。

Dorm had “no sense of personal limitations whatsoever,” my dad said admiringly. That was an ethos Dorm passed on to the boys in his family and his scout troop, which my father joined as soon as he turned twelve.

我爸曾带着敬佩说，多姆“从不给人的能力设限”。多姆把这种精神传给了家里的男孩和他带领的童子军，我父亲一满12岁就立刻加入了童子军。

Both my grandfather and Dorm had dropped out of school, but they handled that challenge in completely different ways, and life’s opportunities followed suit. My grandfather lived in a state of anxiety and clung to his rigid rules. Dorm didn’t dwell on what he lacked but focused on what he could become. My dad preferred Dorm’s way of seeing the world.

我祖父和多姆都从学校辍学，但两人应对这个挑战的方式却完全不同，他们的人生机遇也因此截然不同。我祖父一直生活在焦虑中，死守着他的严格规则。多姆从不执着于自己缺少什么，而是想着自己可以成为什么样的人。我爸比较偏爱多姆的世界观。

In the fall of his junior year in high school, he took eighty-five dollars from his bedroom dresser, walked four blocks to a used-car dealer, and bought a 1939 old Model A Ford coupe with bubble tires. His father wouldn’t let him drive the family car—too much risk for a teenager. My dad wasn’t yet old enough to legally buy the car, so his sister signed the title. (Sometimes when he told the story, my father said she even bought the car for him as a birthday present.)

我父亲在高二那年秋天，从自己房间的柜子里拿了85美元，走过四个街区到一家二手车经销商，买了一辆1939年款的旧式福特A型双门轿车，轮胎都已经旧到鼓起来了。他父亲不让他开家里的车，觉得对青少年来说风险太大了。我爸还没到可以合法买车的年龄，所以是由他姐姐在文件上签名。（后来说起这个故事时，爸爸告诉我，他姐姐买下了那辆车当他的生日礼物。）

He did this knowing his father would be angry—and not just at him. He would never have spent money on a car for his son. And now his sister, forbidden from driving, owned a car.

我爸知道这么做会惹怒他父亲，甚至会牵连到其他人。他父亲绝不会花一毛钱替儿子买车，而被他禁止开车的女儿现在居然拥有一辆车。

My father drove home and nonchalantly announced that he was the proud owner of a beat-up light green coupe. Alarmed by the shouting in front of the house, my grandmother yanked father and son inside, sat them down, and forced them to make peace. My dad maintained that keeping the car running wouldn’t cost much and finally persuaded his dad to go for a drive with him. I like to imagine the two of them together, the unyielding older man finally giving in to his son’s elation. That night, my dad got out of bed twice just to peek at his new purchase. “I was about to bust a button—independence at last!” my dad wrote in a college paper.

我父亲把车开回家，若无其事地宣布，他现在是一辆浅绿色老旧双门轿车的车主了。家门口的吵闹声惊动了我祖母，她将父子俩拉进室内，强迫他们坐下来和解。我爸坚持养车不会花太多钱，最后他说服了祖父和他一起开车兜风。我喜欢想象他们两人当时的场景，固执的老人最终也被儿子的雀跃心情感染了。那天晚上，我爸从床上爬起来两次，只为了看一眼他新买的宝贝。“我真的开心到爆炸。我终于独立了！”我爸在一篇大学作文中写道。

My father named his car Clarabelle, which he thought fit its middle-aged persona. Clarabelle brought him freedom, carrying him on dates, to football games, and on fishing trips. At times as many as ten people squeezed into the rumble seat and hung off the fenders as it rattled down the Bremerton streets and the rutted Forest Service roads outside of town.

我父亲将新车取名为克拉贝尔（Clarabelle），他觉得这个名字很符合这辆车的“中年”形象。克拉贝尔给了他自由，他开着这辆车去约会、看足球赛、钓鱼。有时候甚至会有十个人挤进后座折叠椅，还有人挂在挡泥板上，整辆车就这样在布雷默顿的街道与城外崎岖的林务局公路上颠簸而行。

By then my father had started to drift away from Christian Science, and to question religion broadly. In his last year of high school, my dad and two friends started spending their Sunday nights at the home of their school’s basketball coach, Ken Wills, a revered leader at the school. On Sundays he opened his gym for anyone who’d rather play basketball than go to church. In the evening my dad and his friends listened to his arguments for why they should question the Old Testament and the existence of God.

从那时候起，我父亲也开始渐渐远离基督科学，对宗教本身产生了怀疑。高中最后一年，他和两位好友每个星期天晚上都去篮球校队教练肯·威尔斯（Ken Wills）家——这位教练很受大家尊敬。每到周日，他会开放自家健身房，让那些想打篮球、不想上教堂的人有去处。到了周日晚上，我爸和朋友们会专心听教练讲述为什么他们应该质疑《旧约圣经》与上帝的存在。

The United States was nearly two years into the Second World War, and many of my father’s friends and most men under age forty-five who weren’t already fighting were preparing themselves for war. In the sky above Bremerton floated huge barrage balloons aimed at foiling an attack from Japanese dive-bombers. Down the hill at the Bremerton shipyard the USS Tennessee and surviving ships from Pearl Harbor were repaired. After graduating from high school, my dad joined the Army Reserves, which allowed him to go to the University of Washington until he was called up for active duty. That call came at the end of his freshman year. In June 1944, a week after hundreds of thousands of U.S. troops pushed their way onto the beaches of Normandy, my dad reported to basic training in Arkansas.

当时，美国加入二战已经快两年，我父亲的许多朋友以及45岁以下尚未参战的男性，都在为上战场做准备。布雷默顿的上空漂浮着大型防空气球，用来阻碍日本俯冲轰炸机的攻击。位于山下的布雷默顿造船厂正在修复田纳西号战舰（USS Tennessee）与其他经历珍珠港轰炸的幸存船舰。我爸高中毕业后，随即加入美国陆军预备役，在被征召前可以先进入华盛顿大学就读。大一结束时，他收到了入伍令。1944年6月，就在数十万美军挺进诺曼底海滩一周后，我爸爸到阿肯色州报到，开始接受基础训练。

This is when my father decided to change his name. His birth certificate read “William Henry Gates III,” which to him sounded too posh for the son of a furniture seller. Convinced that the implied status of “the third” would invite ridicule and abuse by drill sergeants and Army peers, he legally stripped off the suffix and replaced it with “Junior.”

就是在这时，我父亲决定要改名。他的出生证明上写的是“威廉·亨利·盖茨三世”（William Henry Gates III），他觉得对一个家具店老板的儿子来说，这个名字太高贵了。他还觉得名字里的“三世”肯定会被教育班长和其他同僚嘲笑，所以正式去掉了名字后面的数字，用“小”（Junior）来替代。

I recognize my dad in the nineteen-year-old who wrote frequent letters home from basic training and later Officer Candidate School. He is humorous, self-aware, talks of how hard he’s working, shows deep feelings for his family back home. Woven throughout his letters is frustration over how difficult the Army’s uncertain schedule makes it for him to arrange a home visit. He’s playful, apologetic for needing extra money from home for small purchases (underwear) and because he loaned another recruit fifteen dollars. Mostly he is thoughtful about his life. The military is hard, he reports. But he focuses on how he is growing, striving to be better. He marvels at the new world he’s exposed to, young men from all walks of life, poor, rich, and people of color. With a group of Southerners, my dad argues about the Civil War.

我爸在接受基础训练期间，以及后来进入预备军官学校时，都经常写信回家。从那个19岁年轻人写的信里，我已经能看到父亲后来的影子。他性格幽默、有自知之明，会告诉家人自己有多努力，也流露出对家人深厚的感情。信里他偶尔会透露沮丧的情绪——军队的日程安排充满不确定性，很难找到时间回家探亲。他很会开玩笑，也会因为不得不跟家里要钱（买内衣之类的小物件，还有他借给另一个新兵15美元）而感到愧疚。大多数时候，他都在思考自己的人生。他写道，军队生活很艰难，但他只想着如何让自己成长，如何变得更好。他对在军中接触到的新世界感到惊叹，见到了来自各地的年轻人，有穷人、富人，还有不同肤色的人。我爸还曾和来自南方的同僚争论美国南北战争的议题。

Officer’s school had regular reviews: if you didn’t pass, you got booted. With each review, my dad saw his class get smaller and smaller. Even as he survived, he worried about the next review, particularly the push-ups, chin-ups, 100-yard chest crawl, and other physical tests. He entered the service as “more or less a weakling,” he wrote. “I sort of get the feeling of becoming a man instead of just a boy now. If I flunk out of here, I know I’ll never recover. If I make it I believe I’ll tackle everything in life more confidently and with more spirit. I’m sure it will make me. Besides the mental side of it I have never been in better shape physically.”

军官学校有定期审查：没通过审查就会被开除。每经过一次审查，我爸班上的人数就会减少一些。就算他暂时留了下来，还是要担心下一次审查，尤其是俯卧撑、引体向上、100码胸部爬行和其他体能测试项目。他刚入伍时“就是个弱不禁风的人”，他写道，“我感觉自己正在成为真正的男人，不再是个男孩了。如果我在这里失败了，我知道自己永远都无法恢复。如果我成功了，我相信自己会变得更有自信，更能应对生活中的一切。我相信这里会塑造我的人格。除了精神层面之外，我的身体状况从未如此好过。”

He did make it—graduating a second lieutenant—and was on a ship to the Philippines on August 15, 1945, when Japan surrendered. My dad spent most of his deployment as part of the first group of GIs in Tokyo. His letters are full of dizzying contrasts: the beauty of climbing Mount Fuji early one morning, and the shocking state of Tokyo after America’s firebombing—burned homes and buildings that were nothing more than concrete shells.

他的确成功了，以少尉军衔毕业。1945年8月15日日本投降时，我父亲正在前往菲律宾的船上。他是第一批驻守东京的美军，大部分服役期都是在那里度过的。他的信里常常能看到各种鲜明的对比：清晨攀登富士山时看到的绝美风景，以及美国轰炸东京后的震撼惨状——烧毁的房屋和只剩混凝土框架的建筑。

My dad rarely talked about his experience in the Army. He knew he was lucky. Officer’s school kept him from battle for a half a year, and then the atomic bomb ended the war. Many of his friends were not so lucky, and those who made it back brought the war home with them. A friend of my parents who lived near us in Seattle had been shot in the head and survived. He kept his mangled helmet and Purple Heart on display at his house. If asked, my father would say military service was extremely valuable for him and leave it at that.

我爸很少谈起他在陆军服役的经历。他知道自己很幸运：军官学校的学习让他远离战场半年，最后原子弹又结束了战争。可他的很多朋友就没这么幸运，就算侥幸活下来，也很难走出战争的阴影。我父母有一位住在西雅图的朋友，离我们家不远，战争时头部中弹，后来活了下来，他把破损的头盔和紫心勋章放在家里展示。如果有人问起，我父亲只会说服役对他来说是段宝贵的经历，点到为止，不会再多说什么。

When he returned to the U.S., Dad was in a hurry to get his degree, start a career, and, well, go dancing.

回到美国后，我爸急着要拿到学位、尽快开启自己的职业生涯，哦，对了，他还想去跳舞。

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My parents had become friends while they were both student government volunteers. The Associated Students of the University of Washington was as much a social club as it was a governing body, and so my parents had many chances to spend time together. At that point the ASUW fought the university’s Board of Regents’ long-held policy that banned political speeches. I know the policy angered my father and he worked to reverse the ban—though he ultimately failed.

我父母因为都是学生会志愿者而成了朋友。华盛顿大学学生联合会既是社交俱乐部，也是管理机构，所以我父母有很多机会相处。当时，学生会一直在和大学董事会争取废除禁止政治演讲的政策。我知道那项政策激怒了父亲，他试图推翻禁令，但最终失败了。

Unlike her soon-to-be boyfriend, who liked to work behind the scenes, my mom thrived at the center, and even more so if she had been chosen for that place by her peers. With typical determination, in her junior year she ran a highly organized campaign for secretary of the student government. She wrote a campaign song (it helped that “Mary” rhymes with “secretary”) and a script for supporters to follow when they phoned students asking for their vote. On election day she meticulously tracked how the five thousand voting students cast their ballots. My mother beat her rivals by a wide margin.

和她那位只喜欢在幕后工作的未来男朋友不同，我妈妈是在舞台上发光的人，如果是被同辈推举上台，她的表现会更出色。凭着一如既往的决心，她在大三时为了竞选学生会秘书，发起了一场极有条理的竞选活动。她创作了一首竞选歌曲（刚好“玛丽”〔Mary〕和“秘书”〔secretary〕两个字押韵），还写了拉票脚本，让支持者给学生打电话时可以照着念。投票日当天，我母亲仔细追踪了五千名投票学生的投票情况。最终，她以悬殊的票数击败对手。

In one scrapbook, she saved congratulatory telegrams from friends and family, along with a handwritten note from her sorority sisters. She also kept a letter from her grandfather. He listed her big wins that spring: elected both to the secretary post and president of her sorority plus placing first in a ski race. As reward for those three wins, he enclosed $75 (about $1,000 today) and congratulated her for “coming out into the limelight.”

在她的一本剪贴簿里，收藏着来自朋友与家人的祝贺电报，还有联谊会姐妹的手写信笺。她还保留着祖父寄给她的信，信中列出了她那年春天的重大胜利：当选学生会秘书与联谊会主席，还赢得了滑雪比赛冠军。为了奖励她赢得这三场胜利，他附上了75美元（相当于今天的1000美元），祝贺她“成为众人瞩目的焦点”。

It’s easy for me to picture my parents’ early friendship. My mom had a warmth and grace of manner that imbued her with an almost magical ability to connect. If you showed up to a party and didn’t know anyone, my mother was the first person to extend her hand, welcome you, and smooth your way into the group in a room. The minister of our church once said that my mother “never met an unimportant person.”

我很容易想象出我父母成为好友的过程。我妈妈非常温暖、优雅，拥有近乎神奇的交际能力。如果你去一场派对却不认识任何人，我母亲会是第一个伸手迎接你的人，还会带着你融入派对人群。我们教会的牧师曾说，我母亲“从未遇过她觉得不重要的人”。

I imagine her compelled to try to draw out tall, skinny Bill Gates Jr. She sees he’s reserved, and she tries to figure out his story, where he’s from, who his friends are, and what makes him tick. She quickly finds common ground: the people and issues of student government. She does this without flirting. He’s two years older, is already thinning up top. Not classically handsome. Her boyfriend at the time was. In photos he looks more chiseled. More middle-of-the-road.

我能想象她会不由自主地想要引导身材高瘦的小比尔·盖茨开口说话。她看得出来他很内向，会想知道他的故事，他来自哪里、有哪些朋友、有哪些喜好。她很快就会找到两人的共通点：学生会的成员身份以及共同关注的议题。她不是在调情，他比她大两岁，头顶已经开始稀疏，不太符合典型的帅哥形象。她当时的男朋友倒是很英俊，从照片上看，他的轮廓更分明、更符合大众审美。

Still, she’s intrigued. When Bill Gates speaks, there are no wasted words. He’s logical, clear, analytical. There are people who think out loud—her best friend, Dorothy, is like that—but this young man speaks from a place of wisdom that seems older, more thoughtful than the people around him. Plus, he’s fun. He’s got a big smile and is a joyous person.

尽管如此，她还是充满好奇。这位比尔·盖茨说话时没有任何废话，逻辑清晰、有条理，还很擅长分析。有些人想到什么就说什么，她最要好的朋友桃乐丝（Dorothy）就是这种人，但这个年轻人说话时充满智慧，看起来比身边的人更老成、想法更深入。此外，他也很风趣，笑容很好看，是个开朗的人。

My dad, for his part, is drawn to my mom’s energy, her quick mind and fearlessness about saying how she feels, even when it comes to telling other people what’s best for them. “Bill, I think it would be a fine idea if you were to…” is probably something he heard soon after getting to know her.

至于我爸，他被我妈的活力、敏捷的思绪，以及勇于表达想法的特质所吸引——就算是在建议别人怎么做对他们最好时，她也很勇于表达。“比尔，我觉得如果你能……会很好”，这大概是他们刚认识时，母亲就对父亲说过的话。

Plus, they danced well together.

而且，他们跳舞时也很合拍。

Mary Maxwell’s photo collection tells the rest of the origin story. From the spring of 1948 pictures show her at dances, parties, and other college events with the chiseled guy. But by early 1950 she must have moved on, no more of that other guy, just a picture from the Dreamer’s Holiday Semi-formal in early 1950: my future mom and dad, seated at a table, beaming at the camera. My dad graduated that spring, with both an undergraduate and a law degree, thanks to an accelerated program offered to veterans. My mom graduated a year later with a degree in education.

玛丽·麦斯威尔的相册补充了这个故事的其他细节。1948年春天拍摄的照片显示，她和那位轮廓分明的男人一起跳舞、参加派对以及其他大学活动。但到了1950年初，他们应该分手了，相册里不再有那个男人的照片，只有一张1950年初的照片：在以流行歌曲《追梦假期》（Dreamer’s Holiday）为主题的半正式舞会上，我未来的爸妈坐在桌旁，对着镜头微笑。我爸在那年春天毕业，同时取得了大学与法律学位，这要归功于当时为退伍军人提供的加速课程。我妈则在一年后毕业，取得了教育学学位。

They must have resolved whatever differences their letters hinted at, because in May 1951 they were married. My mom soon joined my father in Bremerton, where he was working for a local lawyer who doubled as the city attorney. The job had my dad helping people through divorce proceedings and prosecuting the city’s police court cases. My mom, meanwhile, started teaching at the same junior high school my father had attended.

他们肯定成功磨合了之前信中提到的性格差异，因为两人在1951年5月结婚了。我妈跟着我爸来到布雷默顿，当时他为当地一名同时兼任市检察官的律师工作，主要协助人们处理离婚诉讼、起诉警方的案件等等。我妈则在我父亲曾就读的初中任教。

After two years in Bremerton, the prospects of a better job and a more vibrant life lured them back to Seattle, and within months of my birth we moved again, to a newly built house in View Ridge, an area in North Seattle with an elementary school, kids’ park, and library all within walking distance. The whole neighborhood was still under construction when we arrived. I have a film my dad took right after we moved: You can see a dirt yard where our grass hadn’t been planted yet. My sister rides her tricycle on a sidewalk so clean the cement looks almost liquid. Across the street is the wood frame of an unfinished house. I watch the film and am struck by how everything was so new, as if the whole neighborhood had been freshly built for kids like us.

在布雷默顿生活两年后，为了追求更好的工作、更有活力的生活，我父母搬到了西雅图。在我出生几个月后，全家又搬到了维岭（View Ridge）一栋刚建好的房子里。维岭位于西雅图北部，小学、儿童公园与图书馆全都在步行距离内。我们刚到社区时，整个区域还在兴建中。我还留着一段我爸在我们搬去不久后拍的影片：能看到院子里全是泥土，还没种草坪；我姊姊在水泥人行道上骑着三轮车，路面干净平滑，水泥看起来就像液体一样；往街道另一头看去，是一栋尚未完工的木造房屋。我看这段影片时，觉得真不可思议，一切看起来都如此崭新，仿佛整个社区都是为我们这样的孩子专门新建的。
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